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Humour

JohnNichols
Valued Contributor III
8,561 Views

Dear Steve:

I have spent several days trying to get a registered version of VS 2013 Professional working on my Dell computer. It has been a nightmare, the CAB files were corrupted. Finally just sorted out the mess. I am now installing Fortran back to get the integration correct.

During this process I was talking to one of our computer support types, who made the statement that FORTRAN IS DEAD, I mumbled in my beard, Intel etc... and was told .. only one and they will get out of it shortly.

I did not laugh, poor taste

I did not cry, he was young and does not realize that Fortran will last till 42 is a real number again

I did not gnash my teeth, I simply did what any good Fortran programmer would do, I felt sorry for a lower life form and got on with coding.

JMN

 

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46 Replies
Steven_L_Intel1
Employee
4,803 Views

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Paul_Curtis
Valued Contributor I
4,803 Views

Steve, can we get that in a t-shirt?  coffee mug?

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dboggs
New Contributor I
4,803 Views

Rumors of my its death have been greatly exaggerated.

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rase
New Contributor I
4,803 Views

A t-shirt would be a great idea, but with correct spelling (Fortran, not fortran!).
 

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jimdempseyatthecove
Honored Contributor III
4,803 Views

And take the 's off or at least convert it to " is" centered on next line..

I'd buy a mug and cap. Don't think I am nerdy enough for a T-shirt.

Ooh! Just the right things to accompany the cup

A pocket protector....
And companion slide rule
(with logo).

Jim Dempsey

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Steven_L_Intel1
Employee
4,803 Views

The guy who created this, Sorin Suciu, initially left off the 's. He made this in response to a comment I made in a review of his book, The Scriptlings. It's a great book - check it out.

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FortranFan
Honored Contributor III
4,803 Views

jimdempseyatthecove wrote:

...

 a mug and cap. .. T-shirt.

...

These might make better gifts than the "belt"s for the contributors to the IDZ foums as they reach certain point levels... perhaps the Intel Black Belt program team can take this into consideration.

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FortranFan
Honored Contributor III
4,803 Views

Steve Lionel (Intel) wrote:

By the way, there used to be a sizeable section on FORTRAN-related humor in the Wikipedia article on Fortran, mostly jokes at the expense of FORTRAN.  It has been stripped down considerably.

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Ketson_Roberto
Beginner
4,803 Views

Very nice picture!!! it is very fun...I strongly believe that Fortran is alive...:)

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JohnNichols
Valued Contributor III
4,803 Views

Dear People who commented and the ghosters who inhabit this world.

There is a theory that in the sea of programming, three islands rise above the waves, Lisp, C and some say Fortran.

Having programmed in all three, LISP is the best to code in and one would describe it as a tropical island. C is just a maze with weird signs, and Fortran is nirvana, but lacks the lush jungle of the Lisp Island.  I Lisp when I seek beauty, I Fortran when it is quick and dirty and C is for those times of beating ones breast and hair tearing

I am thinking we can probably get the mugs made, I will look into it, but am I allowed to use the image?  I will fix it for F and is.

 

JMN

 

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Steven_L_Intel1
Employee
4,803 Views

If you want to use the image, ask Sorin Suciu (see link above) for contact info

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bmchenry
New Contributor II
4,803 Views

shhhhhhhhhhhhhh!...don't tell anyone your secret about the death of Fortran???!! It might make some of us old folks cry :-( I mean some folks are even foolishly still writing BOOKS on MODERN Fortran  (Markus 'Modern Fortran in Practice' (2012) and Clerman 'Modern Fortran Style an Useage' (2012) & Metcalf "Modern Fortran Explained') Must be a bunch of old folks (like me!) in nursing homes (not yet!) who do it for the historical or is it hysterical purposes?

Heck there's even a guy posting up a site trying to cover up the death of fortran! http://c2.com/cgi/wiki?DeadLanguageFortran

So point is when you hear 'Fortran is Dead' simply think of the Monty Python Holy Grail scene where the guy is walking with the cart 'Bring out your Dead' and the guy is thrown into the cart and he says 'I ain't Dead Yet' http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jdf5EXo6I68

(watch at 1:00) BAM! all ya gots ta do is hit em on the head!  :-)

Brian

p.s. with ability to link Fortran with ANY language it make me laugh when i hear folks converting large programs to C++ or other languages (which generally also changes the programs)...don't they realize through linking you can use the strengths of ALL languages?!!

 

 

 

 

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Steven_L_Intel1
Employee
4,803 Views

bmchenry, see Doctor Fortran in "It's a Modern Fortran World"

Some of the "convert" tendency is lack of expertise for maintaining the existing code. My view, though, is that it's far easier to maintain existing code in a still-supported language, even if your staff needs to study the manuals a bit, than it is to rewrite the code just because you don't like the language. Rewriting always introduces new bugs. Always.

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JohnNichols
Valued Contributor III
4,803 Views

Steve:

I have asked the gentleman for permission to use the image on 5 mugs or t shirts.  I said that there would be zero or little profit and if per chance there is any profit it would be donated to the Cystic Fibrosis Society for research. (Awful disease)

 

We shall wait and see

JMN

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DavidWhite
Valued Contributor II
4,803 Views

Wish I could see what you're talking about, our firewall blocks the link.

 

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FortranFan
Honored Contributor III
4,803 Views

A must listen - the Fortran song on YouTube! :-)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yd6FLETYZ_c

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Steven_L_Intel1
Employee
4,800 Views

David, I've attached the image here.
 

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Steven_L_Intel1
Employee
4,800 Views

FortranFan, thanks for that link! I love it!

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FortranFan
Honored Contributor III
4,800 Views

John Nichols wrote:

Dear Steve:

I have spent several days trying to get a registered version of VS 2013 Professional working on my Dell computer. It has been a nightmare, the CAB files were corrupted. Finally just sorted out the mess. I am now installing Fortran back to get the integration correct.

During this process I was talking to one of our computer support types, who made the statement that FORTRAN IS DEAD, I mumbled in my beard, Intel etc... and was told .. only one and they will get out of it shortly.

I did not laugh, poor taste

I did not cry, he was young and does not realize that Fortran will last till 42 is a real number again

I did not gnash my teeth, I simply did what any good Fortran programmer would do, I felt sorry for a lower life form and got on with coding.

JMN

John,

You may be familiar with this thread at comp.lang.fortran and the online link to a PDF article by Craig Dedo on "Debunking the Myths About Fortran".

Re: ".. I was talking to one of our computer support types, who made the statement that FORTRAN IS DEAD.." - all around me, these "computer support types" have the attention span of a 2 year-old and one wonders if they can read beyond bits and bytes :-)

But putting all jokes aside, you may consider forwarding the Dedo article to this guy who made the "IS DEAD" remark.

 

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William_S_1
Beginner
4,664 Views

Tell that "doubting Thomas" to try to run an APP with REAL(16) precision on C++.

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